Okay, so here's the second part to Axel 1 that wouldn't fit in the first one. Boo. xD
“ Yo Ape, what did you do to him?” Ryan, Brandon, and Raab asked. “ This morning he was- uh, normal.” Ape looked at the two of them on the couch before answering, “ Bam lost her today, and when he found her, she was surrounded by all these people who were staring at her, and I tell ya, she looked traumatized. She looked like she got hit by a truck. Now, he feels horrible, and he’s all- mopey. You know how much she’s scared of people.” Raab and Ryan nodded. “ Now I feel bad.” Ryan admitted, smiling. “ I didn’t know he could be so dramatic.” April realized a few minutes after Ryan made that statement. “ And you know what the weird thing is? She doesn’t even care that he’s holding her captive. Blaze is outside, on the deck, and he’s crying for her, and normally she’d be looking for him in two seconds, but today just scared the shit out of her.”
Two hours had passed, and Bam was still on the couch. Regularly, Bam would have been over an incident like this in five minutes. Bam was changing, and it worried almost everyone in the house. Two days later, the issue of Teen People magazine came out. The front cover featured most of the pictures those photographers took days earlier, but also included pictures of them in the car, at the mall, and even when they returned from the mall, when Axel and Bam were sitting out the day on the couch. The front cover read, “ Bam, daddy-o!” The actual article was:
“ We all know Bam Margera does whatever he wants, but does that include parenting a godchild? You bet. When Teen People caught up with Bam, 25, at a skate demo, he was very enthused about his new favorite. ‘ She’s gonna keep me pretty occupied!’ he gushed. So, has Bam’s bro, Jesse Margera, been bamming anyone lately? Nope. Sources close to Bam say that the child was the daughter of one of Bam’s good friends. Fortunately, he wasn’t any of the four lunatics that live with him. Teen People did try to ask the friends for any further information, but none were open for comment. How ironic. Anyways, who is this mystery girl that has been at Bam’s side since Wednesday? Her name, Axel Margera. Her age, 6. Also, it has been reported that the girl owns a small Beagle, that goes by the name of Blaze. The dog seems to be very loyal to his owner, and gets along with Bam’s two cats, Trouble and Mischief, just fine. But, is Bam very loyal to his new companion? On Thursday, Margera, his mother April, and his new child were shopping at a nearby Pacific Sunwear in the Haltor Mall when Bam ‘lost sight’ of the 6-year-old. Apparently, Axel and large crowds mix as well as water and oil, because according to one onlooker, the girl, ‘looked like she had seen a ghost’. Once Bam noticed her disappearance, which was about twenty minutes after she had been left alone, he and April went into a frantic search for Axel. When they saw the commotion going on outside the store, Super Bam went in and saved the day. ‘ He didn’t let her walk by herself, but he held her. He left the mall, holding the girl. You can tell he is very attached to her.’ says another onlooker. According to our photographers, ‘ They seemed to have shared a special bond, or something, because they looked very happy. But, after the mall incident, they went home, Bam looked very guilty, and they talked to absolutely no one. Bam went the entire day without talking to one person. He just sat on the couch, and stared into space for five hours.’ And what did Axel do to pass the time? ‘ Axel never left him. You can tell she considers him her savior, or something, because she doesn’t go to anyone else. She sat on his lap and slept the entire rest of the day.’ Whew. One photographer overheard the two chatting at a skating demo in Boston, ‘ Axel told him she was afraid of the cameras after he talked to some of the reporters. He just said okay, and they left. He didn’t say another word to a reporter.’ That takes commitment. And what does the fam think of Bam? ‘ I can’t believe it’s still Bam.’ April told Teen People. ‘ He’s just changed so much since Axel came here, and she’s had such a big impact on our lives, we just love her.’ And what did fat boy Phil have to day? ‘ It’s strange, the way people change people. Bam went from a bad ass to a somewhat responsible individual in less than a week.’ It takes a lot to get the bad ass out of our Bam. Hopefully, this little girl will keep her godfather out trouble. We can only hope.”
“ Oh my God.” April muttered. She put the issue of ‘Teen People’ down on the conveyer belt and took out her credit card. The woman at the cashier smiled and asked, “ Is it for Bam?” she held up the ‘Teen People’. Axel nodded. “ Oh, yeah. And for Axel, too. Most of that damn article is true, but me and Phil never commented on it. They never asked us.” The woman chuckled. “ That’s strange. Is she really afraid of photographers?” she asked, and gave the three bags of groceries to April. “ Yep. And she can’t handle large crowds. Where she used to live, there was practically no social events going on. There was just the harvest festival, and that was it. She’s just not used to them.” The woman looked fascinated. “Oh. Well, have a nice day!” the woman called as April rushed to the car.
Once she got home, April slammed the magazine on the kitchen counter. “ Read it.” she demanded as Bam picked it up. He hadn’t gotten out of the slump he was in two days ago. Axel was doing just fine. Retreating to the couch, Bam read and re-read the article. He smiled, and returned the magazine back to April. “ They shouldn’t talk crap about you like that!” she complained, but Bam held up his hand. “ It’s not crap,” he shot back. “ But, I never said she was gonna keep me pretty occupied.” April nodded her head. “ Yeah, see? They’re putting words in all our mouths. I am so glad that none of your friends wanted to talk.” Bam scratched the back of his head. “ Yeah, well, even if they did, they wouldn’t know what to say about her.” April shrugged and walked away to go complain to Phil, who was outside, in the back.
A few hours later, Bam seemed to be getting out of his slump. He was in different clothes, and was talking outside with Ryan. He called over Axel, who was in the backyard playing with Blaze. “ Axel! Come here! We’re going to get your mutt tags!” he yelled. She scurried over, and asked, “ What?” Ryan folded his arms and repeated Bam, “ We’re going to go get Blaze some tags, and a collar and a leash and shit.” April looked over at them. “ You’re not going to lose her? Ryan isn’t as sharp as I am.” Bam shrugged. “She won’t get lost, right Axel?” he looked down at the girl, and she grabbed his hand. “ See? I have her trained well.” Axel snorted. “ Alrighty then. See ya!” she called and returned to her debate with Phil over the article.
The three headed through the house and to the car. They raced down the street, and Blaze lay on Axel’s lap. The dog had just been put through a series of long chases, mainly after a long stick, which was hard for him to bring back. Axel would expect any dog to be panting after that, but not this hard. She pet the dog softly, as if it would calm him down. “ What’s the matter with him?” Ryan asked as he turned in his seat to look at the dog. Blaze was panting very heavily, and Axel knew from experience that it was not normal. “ I don’t know.”
When they reached the pet supplies store, Bam, Ryan, and Axel went directly to the counter, with Bam holding the small dog. They stood behind a woman who was buying hamster food. Once they reached the counter, Bam put Blaze down, and told the woman,
“ We need to get tags and crap.” The woman smiled and picked up the Beagle. “ He doesn’t sound very healthy...” she announced, and put him down to rub the sides of his neck. When that didn’t work, she pressed her hand against Blaze’s head. “ He’s overheated,” she told them. “ All you have to do is keep him from running around too much, and he’ll be better.” Axel sighed with relief. “ I thought it was something serious.” she replied, and reached to hug her dog. Blaze’s tail wagged. “ Has he been running around a lot?” the woman asked the little girl. Axel nodded and replied, “ We were playing fetch before we came here.”
The woman smiled again and replied, “ Ah, well you see, in small dogs, it’s not good to run long distances, so just cut back on the amount of times you throw the stick. Especially during hot days like this. If you want him to spend some time outside, get a long leash and tie it around a tree, and put a bowl of food and water out for him, and he’ll get all the exercise he needs. Bam nodded, and listened intently. “ So, let’s get those tags done.” the woman announced, and took out a tray with different styles of dog tags on them. She held out the tray to Axel and said, “ Pick out which style you want for the name tag. The vaccine tag will have to be plain and round. Axel looked at all of the styles, until she found one that looked like a fire hydrant. “ That one,” she said as she pointed to the fire hydrant. “ Good choice.” the woman replied, and took the tray back to get a fire hydrant shaped tag out. She also took out a paper and a pen and told Bam, “ You’ll need to fill this out. You can go over there and do it if you like.” The woman pointed to a table that was littered with papers. Bam nodded and walked over to the desk. As he began filling out the form, his cell phone rang.
“ You didn’t lose her yet, did you?” April said. “ No, Ape. I’m going to give you to Dunne ‘cause I have to fill out this form shit.” Bam replied before handing the phone to Ryan.
“ What?” he asked. “ Is Axel still with you guys?” she asked. “ Yeah, the store isn’t that big. And it has doors. To keep her inside.” Ryan replied. “ Okay, well, I was just checking.” she said. “ Okay, well, we’re all still here, including the mutt.” Ryan voiced into the cell phone.
“ Good. I have to go now.” April said as she hung up. Ryan stared at the phone. “ She hung up on me.” he told Bam, who laughed. Axel suddenly saw a camera flash, and shuffled over to Bam. He picked her up and placed her on the counter, and continued to fill out the paper. When he finished filling it out, it read:
Animal’s Name: Blaze Margera
Animal’s Address: 43 West Gay Street, West Chester, PA
Animal’s Owner: Axel Margera
Owner’s Phone Number: 484-315-2610
Affiliated Owners: Bam Margera, April Margera, Phil Margera
Bam handed the paper back to the woman, and she brought it to the back of the store. A large man took it, as well as the fire hydrant tag, and went through a pair of double doors. He disappeared behind them, and the woman returned to her station at the register. “ Has Blaze been vaccinated yet?” she asked, and pulled out another circular tag. “ Nope.” Bam replied, and pulled out his credit card. “ Then, you’ll have to take him to the vet to get that done. You can give this tag to them, and once he has been shot, they’ll engrave it.”
Bam nodded and looked over at Ryan. “ Dunne! Go get a leash and a collar.” he then turned to Axel and asked, “ Do you want to go find the colors?” Axel nodded and ran over to Ryan so they could go find the collar and leash. Bam returned his attention to the woman, who was now grinning. Bam looked puzzled, but handed over the credit card anyway. A few minutes later, Ryan and Axel returned from the second aisle, with a dark blue leash and a light blue collar, as well as some dog food. “ That’ll be $45, please.” she said before she swiped the card. He entered his pin number and pressed the button for no cash back. The large man returned from the back with the fire hydrant, now with the words, “Blaze Margera” imprinted on it. The woman attached it to the collar, and then attached the collar to the dog. Bam put the leash on the collar, and handed it to Axel. She took it and they all walked out of the store, after thanking the cashier.
When they returned home, a large, tan truck sat in the driveway. A woman in a matching tan outfit stood next to April, who looked like she would erupt with anger at any second.
“ What the hell’s going on?” Bam called. April immediately shouted back, “ This woman thinks that Axel is actually from an orphanage!” The woman replied calmly, “ There are distinct similarities between this girl and a girl that ran away from the Kayak River Adoption Agency a week ago.” Bam looked bewildered, and grabbed Axel’s hand. Her little hand was very sweaty.
“ Look,” Bam announced, “ We’re sorry if there is a coincidence with that girl’s escape, and Axel’s dad’s death. Luke even told me two days before he died that he didn’t want Axel to be in an orphanage, ‘cause he knew I would give her a better home.” Axel looked up at her godfather, and then back at the social worker. The woman was trying to think of questions that would stump Bam, but none came to mind. She marched towards the tan truck and huffed, “ I am truly sorry for this mistake.” and drove away.
A smile formed on April’s face, and she began laughing. “ Success!” he whispered loudly. Ryan was still stunned. “ Who the hell is Luke?” he asked. “ Some retarded name that just popped into my head at that time.” Bam answered. Ryan took the bag of dog food into the house, and put it on the kitchen counter. He then went out to the back, where everyone was sitting. Bam and Axel took the dog food and poured some into a bowl for the dog, who began eating it greedily. They brought the food as well as a bowl of water to the back yard, and let the dog gorge himself.
The next day, Bam, Axel, and Ryan again took Blaze out, but this time it was to the vet.
“ We need to get his shots done.” Bam told the secretary. She nodded and asked for Blaze’s name, and his owner’s name, address, and telephone number. He gave her the correct information, and soon they were sitting on the bench, waiting for their turn with the vet. “ Blaze Margera!” the vet called about a half hour later. All three went in with the dog, and after a quick inspection, he told all three of them to wait outside while the did the shots.
“ That damn collar reminds me of the time when we painted the kitchen blue.” Bam told Ryan. He smirked and replied, “ Oh, yeah. Remember that time when we did that skating competition while Ape and Phil went to AC? That was funny. God damn Rowley. Sitting in the trees.” The laughed about their previous actions for about fifteen minutes, until Blaze came back out, with a band-aid on his left thigh. “ It’ll clear up in about a day or so.” He gave Bam the leash. They went over to the counter to pay for Blaze’s operation, and left. More cameras followed them.
“ Ya know what helps?” Bam told Axel as they were driving back. “ Ignoring them. If you just pretend they’re not there, then you won’t be so scared.” Axel thought about this for a minute. She agreed with herself that she would just ignore the photographers from that point on. Which was why she didn’t get scared when Bam let them come by to take pictures of everyone the next day. It was for a different magazine, however. The photographers followed them to New York City, where they were asked to come to go on TRL. Bam seemed excited about the show, but Axel could never be more nervous. The thought of going on tv scared her a lot. Bam seemed to notice her stress, and talked with her to keep her mind off of it. They and the photographers, as well as all of Bam’s friends, boarded the plane that would take them to NYC.
About a half hour later, they arrived at the airport, where the TRL escorts would take them to the set. Butterflies swooped up in Axel’s stomach, and she held Bam’s hand as they walked to the car for support. They all got into the big SUV, although the photographers had to find an alternate route. They sat in silence as the tension built up in the car. When they finally arrived at the set, there were already hundreds of people outside the building, waiting. Screaming. Axel held on tight to Bam and Raab’s hands, just so she wouldn’t get lost again. When they got into the building and on the appropriate floor, Bam and Axel were to wait backstage until they were introduced. Axel heard the screaming fans, and the hosts.
“ Hey, what’s up everyone, I’m Vanessa, and this is TRL!” the host said, and the cheers grew louder. “ Now, I know you all know that we’ve got Bam Margera and his new godkid waiting backstage,” the woman paused so the fans could cheer. “ Yeah, there’s a lot of buzz going on around them, and I know you guys are all amped up to see them, so let’s just bring them out here right now!” the cheers erupted in such a huge noise that Axel was sure people from New Jersey could hear them. Before she knew it, Bam was leading her into the large room. She tried to smile, but she was just so overcome with fear, and confusion, that she didn’t know what to do. She just clutched Bam’s hand and listened to the woman and Bam talk.
“ So, I know there’s been a lot of stuff going around about you guys over in Pennsylvania, and I was wondering if you could tell us a bit more about how exactly you came across her.” Bam smiled and looked down at his godchild. Then, he replied into the mike, “ Well, my buddy Luke died not too long ago, from pneumonia, and two days before he died, I was with him, and he told me, that he didn’t want her to go into an orphanage, because he didn’t want her with someone he didn’t trust, and so he told me when he left, that I should take her. And now, I don’t know how to raise a kid, so I figured Ape could help me or something, but, it’s actually a lot easier than I thought. All you have to do is make sure they aren’t crying about something and they aren’t locked out of the house.”
Vanessa laughed at this, and answered, “ Oh, wow. And, there’s tons of stuff that people are putting in magazines, and tell me, in ‘Teen People’, it says that you actually lost her. Is that true?” Bam held in a laugh and replied, “ I won’t lie, that part is true. We were clothes shopping, and she wandered away while Ape asked me to look at something, and when we noticed she was gone, there was a huge crowd outside the store, just staring at her. I was seriously petrified, because she absolutely hates to be in front of a camera, or huge crowds, or anything that has to do with the public. I had to drag her here, seriously. She just is so shy because she came from a small town that gets absolutely no attention. And I’m not even kidding, the biggest event that happened last year was their Harvest Festival. So, anyway, I was so scared for her, and it was right then when I felt like a true parent, because who wouldn’t freak out when their kid is lost?” Vanessa burst out laughing, and even Axel giggled.
Vanessa turned to Bam and said, “ So, what is it like to have a kid? I mean, her in particular?” Bam paused for a minute to gather his words, and said, “ This one, she’s only six, but she has the mind of a twelve year old. Really, she poured beer all over me the second day she was at our house. She thought of it all by herself and got everyone else in on it, and even Ape helped. She brought a bucket of beer up to the roof, and when all the guys called me outside, she dumped it on me. She is just- amazing.” The audience went wild for this. The episode of ‘Viva La Bam’ with that material hadn’t been aired yet, since they weren’t done filming the season. Vanessa grinned, and knelt down to Axel. “ Did you really pour beer on him?” Axel hugged Bam’s pant leg and replied in the most innocent voice possible, “ Yeah.” the audience was so sympathetic with this voice, and Vanessa found her adorable.
“ Can we ask her some questions?” she asked Bam. Bam picked her up and replied, “ Yeah, sure.” Vanessa smiled and held her microphone close to her mouth to ask the question. “ What do you think of Bam?” Bam held his microphone close to her mouth so she could answer, “ He’s crazy.” Vanessa was in stitches after Axel answered, as was Bam. He put the microphone to his own mouth and said, “ Ya, thanks Axel. I love you too.”
Once Vanessa stopped laughing, she thought of another question, “ What is your diet, girl? You’re so thin!” Axel didn’t say anything, but smiled. Bam answered for her. “ I have no idea what her problem is, but she’s so light. Here, feel how light she is.” Bam put his godchild down so Vanessa could pick her up. “ Wow, she is light.” the hostess exclaimed. “ Alright, we’ll be right back with more of TRL in a sec, so stay here!” the audience took their cue, and began cheering.
Suddenly, the cameras were off, and Bam took Axel over to the audience talk with them. They had a lot of questions, which surprised Axel. The first person’s question was, “ What’s up with Jenn?” There was that Jenn person that Axel knew nothing about again. “ Erm, me and her are off and on, but right now, we’re off, because I’ve been so preoccupied and everything.” He pointed to a boy, with long, dark hair. “ Where are you doing your next demo?” Bam thought for a moment before answering, “ My next demo is going to be in L.A., and I have to leave for there tomorrow morning so I can be there by the afternoon. And then the actual demo is going to be at around 6:00 over there.” The third person raised her hand, and asked, “ Who else is going to be there?” Bam counted how many people, and replied,
“ Tony Hawk, Bucky Lasek, and Mike Vallely.” The fifth person raised her hand and asked,
“ What’s the most amount of skaters you’ve ever done a demo with?” Bam sighed and thought hard. “ About, five or six? There usually aren’t a lot of skaters at a demo, because of the size of the place it’s held at.”
Once again, the cameras turned on, and Vanessa appeared, saying into the camera, “ Welcome back to TRL! We’ve got Bam Margera and Axel Margera over there, and they’re waiting to answer some of the audience’s questions, so let’s get to it!” Bam was sitting in the audience between a gothic-looking girl, and Vanessa, with Axel sitting on his lap. He looked above him at the curious audience, and started the questionnaire train again. Once Vanessa announced what they were going to do next, Axel almost chocked on her own saliva. “ Okay guys, we’re going to be giving away free Tony Hawk Underground 2's and Bam’s movie, Haggard, but only if two of the audience members can answer all of the questions that will be given to them by Bam.
“ If only one of them gets all ten questions right, the audience will get either Haggard or THUG 2, depending on which side the person is on. If they both get them wrong, then the audience won’t get anything free, so you better hope they know their stuff!” Vanessa told the audience, and the camera. Bam and Axel were placed in a certain spot on the stage, while two random audience members were picked by Vanessa. They stood opposite Bam and Axel, and as soon as Vanessa started the competition, Bam started belting out questions about himself. The first audience member got all ten questions right, but the second audience member missed one. So, the entire audience got a copy of THUG 2, but no Haggard.
Once their part on TRL ended, Raab, Brandon, Ryan, and Rake all congratulated them on their TV performance. Axel was exhausted, and fell asleep on the plane ride home. When she woke up the next morning, only Bam was up. “Jeese, do you even sleep?” Axel asked, while rubbing her eyes. “ We have to leave this morning. For L.A.” Bam said, while putting his cell phone to his ear. “ Yeah, Jenn? Come with us to L.A. only for two days. No, we’ll be staying at Jessica’s house. Yeah, Nick will be there. Trust me. Come.” as he said that, he hung up. Axel gaped at him. “ Who is this Jenn person everyone knows about but me?” Bam snickered and replied, “ You’ll meet her. Don’t worry. Now, go get dressed. We’re leaving as soon as she comes.”
About fifteen minutes after Axel was ready, Jenn arrived. She was actually kind of pretty, with her blonde hair, and thin body. Jenn looked at Bam for a while, but when she realized he wasn’t looking at her, she followed his gaze to see what was going on. Before she even looked, his smile told her he was concerned about something. As Axel walked over, and stood in front of the two, Jenn realized what it was. He was worried if the two would accept or reject each other. Bam switched from putting his arm around Jenn, to kneeling down to hold his godchild at her waist. “ This,” Bam said to Jenn, “ is Axel. Axel, this is Jenn.” Jenn looked stunned for a minute, then hurt. Then, she smiled. “ So, you’re the famous Axel everyone has been talking about?” she said in a slight baby-ish tone. “ It’s an honor to meet you.” She stuck out her hand, and Axel shook it.
Bam stood up, and yelled, “ Yo, Ape!” April scurried to the bannister. “ What?” she yelled down, slightly annoyed. “ We’re going.” he replied, and grabbed the keys to the Mercedes. April sighed and went back to sleep.
A few minutes later, they arrived at the airport. After paying for their tickets, they boarded the plane for L.A. and were flown to the nearest airport. There, Jessica and Nick (whoever they were) would be waiting for them. Jenn looked very excited to see them. “ Oh, wow! I never thought I’d ever meet Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey!” However, Bam and Axel didn’t see what the huge deal was. Bam was used to hanging around people like them, and Axel didn’t know they were famous.
Axel was extremely bored during their flight. So, she decided to take a peek at the issue of ‘Teen People’ that she was in. She looked at the pictures on the cover, and wondered how they got these shots, since most of the time, there wasn’t a camera around to take the shot. They had a picture of them at the restaurant, at the mall, the aftermath of the mall, and so on. The magazine also had pictures of all these people others considered famous. People like Jennifer Lopez, Paris Hilton, Keanu Reeves, Ashton Kutcher, Britney Spears, Orlando Bloom, Halle Barry, Matthew Perry, and others.
Axel put the magazine down, and looked over at Bam. He was chatting with someone on his cell phone. She took a huge breath and blew up at him, so it would reach his face, and it spooked him a little bit. At least she got a good laugh out of it for about thirty seconds. The rest of the time on the plane was spent looking out the plane window, and at all the funny looking people below.
Once they arrived at the airport, they went in search of Nick and Jessica. That magazine didn’t have any pictures of either of them, unfortunately, so Axel had no clue who to look for. But, when they found them, Nick and Jessica were holding up a big sign that read, “Bam, Axel + Jenn!” Axel was surprised they knew her name, but that probably was because Bam had told them.
“ Aw, Bam, she’s so adorable!” was Jessica’s first comment. Axel held on tight to Bam’s hand. However, when she noticed Nick and Jessica’s dog, she broke off from her godfather to go pet her. After a while, Axel went back over to Bam, and tugged at his sleeve. He picked her up and asked, “ What?” Axel replied loud enough for Nick, Jess, and Jenn to hear, “ We should have brought Blaze.” They all laughed, and Jessica asked, “ Oh, Bam, can I hold her? She’s so adorable!” Bam put Axel down so she could go over to Jessica, and when she picked her up, she found that Bam’s godchild was incredible light. “ Oh my God, you’re so light!” she cooed. “ We have to feed you!”
Jessica put the girl down, who scurried back over to Bam. “ How old is she?” Nick asked. Bam was looking down at Axel at the time, so he looked up at Nick before answering,
“ She’s only six, but she acts like a twelve year old. I’m not even kidding, she got everyone in the house in on this prank, and even Ape helped with it. Ape brought a bucket of beer up to the roof, and Axel dumped it all over me.” Nick and Jessica laughed at this, and while they were laughing, Bam remembered something.
“ Oh, yeah, Axel, that’s Nick,” Bam pointed to the man, “ and that’s Jessica.” he then pointed to the woman. “ Sweetie, just call me Jess.” Jessica requested. She was actually very pretty, with an almost model look. She had blonde hair that was pulled into a bun, and she had the prettiest make-up on. Nick, however, had brownish colored hair, and gorgeous blue eyes. Sort of like Axel’s.
Then the camera flashed. Bam instinctively picked her up, and whispered in her ear, “ Just ignore them.” Axel stayed quiet, and soon she felt better. But, she stayed in Bam’s arms. “ She’s afraid of the camera-men.” Bam mouthed to Jess and Nick, who were looking confused. Jenn, however, had read the issue of ‘Teen People’ and had already learned that. After that, they decided to leave for Jess and Nick’s house.
They all got into Nick’s truck, and drove away to their mansion. “ Did you read the latest ‘Us’, Bam?” Nick asked. “ Uh, no, I haven’t.” he confessed. “ Here.” Nick replied, and gave him the magazine. “ Look at some of the bull they put in there.” Bam held it at an angle so both he and Axel could look at it. The article inside had read:
“ Everyone has been asking the same question over and over and over, ‘ Who is that girl Bam’s with?’ Well, Bam Margera’s new gal is a little young for him. Axel Margera, 6, has been seen everywhere with the pro skater, from Boston, to the Haltor Mall. While Bam was shredding up the half pipe at Boston with skater Tony Hawk, Axel was eating an ice cream Bam had bought for her. ‘ It was very hot that day,’ and onlooker of the Margeras told Us, ‘ so he was cooling her down, and giving her something to do while he showed Massachusetts his tricks.’ When Axel had met Tony Hawk, she wasn’t starstruck like so many people would be. ‘ Axel had never said a word to Tony, and was clinging to Bam the whole time.’ One of Bam’s friends had told Us. Also, that incident at the Haltor Mall left everyone wondering, ‘ Is Bam truly ready for parenting?’ Incase you didn’t already hear, Bam, his mother April Margera, and little Axel went shopping late Thursday morning, when Axel got lost. This was when we found that the 6-year-old doesn’t cope well with the public, since she looked just about ready to faint. ‘ You could see the fear on Bam’s face when he saw that crowd,’ another onlooker told Us, ‘ he obviously knew she was in there, and he obviously knew she was afraid of that crowd. Then, someone announced he was coming, and then they all jumped on him. He and April left the mall with Axel, without talking.’ Wow. A few days later, Bam took Axel to NYC where they were guest stars for the show TRL. ‘ Axel was very quiet, but she was talkative when she needed to be.’ the host of TRL, Vanessa, told Us. When the camera was off, Bam stood in front of the audience and was answering their questions. One of the questions was, ‘ What’s up with Jenn?’ Huh. So, where has Bam’s girl been for the past few weeks? ‘ We’re off and on,’ Bam answered to that audience member. ‘ Right now, we’re off, because I have my hands full as it is.’ But, where is the skater heading off to next? L.A., for a skating demo. He’s going to be crashing at his bud, Jessica Simpson’s house. Let’s just hope Nick is home. Obviously, he’ll be bringing along his favorite companion, and maybe his companion’s companion. Axel’s baby Beagle, Blaze, was last spotted with the 6-year-old, Bam, and Bam’s friend, Ryan Dunne, at a pet supplies store, where they bought a collar, leash, dog food, and Blaze’s very own tag. Maybe the Lachey’s dog, Daisy, will have a playmate. There have also been reports of Axel’s weight. With Hollywood being obsessed with weight issues, we decided to show you exactly what’s been going on with poor Axel.’ She’s perfectly healthy.’ April Margera told Us. That’s not what our expert, Dr. Matthew Breeze says. ‘ A girl of that age should not be that light. Either she is going through food struggles, or she hasn’t been given enough to eat to sustain her weight.’ Of course, April wouldn’t allow Bam to starve her, would she? ‘ Bam would never do that! There’s no reason to.’ Jenn told Us. Hollywood is just plain crazy.”
Bam chuckled. Axel stared at it numbly. “ Those retards.” he told Nick, and handed him back the magazine. “ Yeah. Exactly.” A few minutes later, they arrived at a huge mansion. Axel got out of the car, and stared at the house in awe. “ Wow...” she gasped. In all the foster homes she had been in, none were this huge. All of the foster homes she had been in gave her back to that dank shack thirty children called home. None had been as kind as Bam was to her, or as fun. Most of them were all strict, uptight people who thought they had the best of everything. But they had never seen the Lachey home before.
They walked into the foyer, which was the most amazing thing Axel had ever seen. Bam smiled and listened to Axel repeat, “ Wow...” over and over again. When they came to the living room, Axel was completely in awe. Not at the furniture, but at the size of the TV. The console was taller than Bam was from fingertip to fingertip. Bam, Axel, and Jenn sat down on the white couch with Nick, as Jess went into the kitchen. “ Do you guys want anything?” she called, while taking out a Bud Light. “ Yeah, I’ll take a beer.” Bam called. “ Do you want anything to eat?” he asked Axel. She shook her head. “ What about you, sweetie?” Jess called. Axel shook her head and replied, “ No thank you.” Jess gasped, but it wasn’t a bad gasp. She was just surprised. “ Wow, you have the best manners I have ever heard!” she cried, and laughed. “ Yeah, I trained her well.” Bam replied, and ruffled the his godchild’s hair.
“ Did you see the game?” Nick asked Bam. He shook his head and replied, “ The plane had Lord of the Friggin Gay Ass Rings on all throughout the plane ride. Not that we were close enough to hear it. I got tickets in the back for a reason, ya know. Nick smiled and shook his head. “ Ah, I know exactly what ya mean.” Axel got tired of listening to their conversation, and moved her head onto the side of Bam’s arm, which blocked her ear. She would have put her head on his shoulder, but she was no where near tall enough. Once Jess had passed the beers out to everyone, she sat down next to Axel and said, “ Are you sure you don’t want anything to drink? No water, soda?” Axel smiled and replied, “ No thank you, I’m fine.” Jess raised her eyebrows and took a swig of beer.
“ What time is it?” Bam asked. “ Uh, 7:34.” Nick answered, after looking at his watch. “ Wow, we have to get over there. The demo is gonna start in half an hour.” Bam stood up, and motioned for Axel and Jenn to follow. They too, stood up, and right before they were going to start going, Jess burst out, “ Really? We’d be glad to take you. Right, hunnie?” she glanced over at Nick before he answered, “ Oh, yeah, sure. We’d love to take you.” Bam shrugged. “ Alrighty then.” he declared, and they all filed out of the house, and back into the truck.
About a half hour later, they arrived at the site where the demo was. Tons of fans were lined on the sides. They began yelling and cheering as Bam stepped out of the truck. He pulled Axel down and they walked towards the half pipe with Jenn, Jess, and Nick. Jess was amazed at the sound of the people- she had heard them at all her concerts, but never in an environment like this. She acted as if she were a little eight year old in a toy shop.
Bam chuckled and shook his head. Although he had never taken Axel shopping for toys, he knew she wouldn’t act like Jess. The girl was too mature for that behavior. On the other hand, maybe he should take her shopping for toys, just to see what would happen.
Nick smiled at all the people who were cheering. Obviously, they weren’t cheering for him, but for Bam, but it was nice to encourage them. He looked over at Bam, who was glancing at the crowds, and at his godchild. ‘ They shouldn’t even consider him her godfather,’ he thought. ‘ Just her regular father. He can’t be that devoted to her and not even be related.’
Then the games began. Bam, Nick, Jess, and Jenn all shook hands with Tony, Bucky Lasek, and Mike Vallely. Tony kneeled down to Axel’s height, and said, “ And how have you been? I saw you on TV!” Axel smiled and hugged Bam’s pant leg. “ Mike and Bucky looked down at her, and Bucky said, “ I heard you went to the mall with Bam and April!” Mike smiled and added, “ Yeah, I heard you got lost.” Axel smirked and nodded. “ Yeah, we’ve learned not to move, right Axe?” Bam said as he moved the leg Axel was clinging to. He looked down to make sure she felt it. The little girl nodded and looked up at her godfather.
Once everyone was on top of the half pipe, Tony nodded and all four of them dropped into the half pipe. Jess was amazed at everything- the noise the fans were making, the speed of the skaters, and their closeness to the half pipe. “ Aren’t we a little too close?” Jess had to yell over the noise the fans were making, just so Jenn could hear her. “ Naw, too close would be standing in the middle of the pipe.” Jenn replied, and pointed to the spot on the pipe where they would be standing. Jess nodded and kneeled down to wrap her arms around Axel’s middle. Bam glanced over at the group for about two seconds, and smiled once he saw Jess and Axel. He didn’t want the entire entertainment district to shun his new godchild, and just the fact that Jess was acting motherly was good enough. Axel needed a mother figure, even for only two days.
The demo continued, and Axel grew more tired with watching every skater jump up and do a trick. Suddenly, it was 8:30, and Axel was just about to fall asleep. “ Are you tired, hun?” Jess called. Axel nodded, and closed her eyes. “ Here, Nick, can you hold her until this thing is done?” Nick picked her up, and said, “ Why don’t we just put her in the truck?” Jess looked up at him like he had five heads. “ Are you kidding? It’s like, two-hundred degrees in there! I don’t want her in there until all of us leave.” Nick shrugged and continued watching the four skaters nearly kill each other.
Once it was finally all over, Bam took Axel while Jenn held his skateboard. “ She’s so cute, Bam. I’m so jealous!” Jess whispered, as to not awake her. Bam laughed, which caused the little girl to wake up. Still groggy, she smothered her face in her godfather’s shirt. Bam tried putting her down, but the girl refused to stand on her own. So, once she fell back asleep a few minutes later, he had to make Nick hold her again while Bam signed autographs. Tony, Bucky, and Mike were all doing the same thing. Once again, Axel woke up, and Nick said,
“ Are you going to stay awake?” she nodded as she was rubbing her eyes. Nick held her for a few more minutes, just so she could get used to being awake, then let her down to go run around on her own.
Bam saw Axel sitting on his skateboard, near Jess and Jenn. He laughed at how small she was while sitting on the skateboard. He watched her for a few more moments, then went back to signing autographs.
“ Hey, Bam, who’s that?” Mike called and pointed to a pinched-faced woman storming over to him. “ Godfather my ass!” the woman yelled. It silenced the entire crowd, and had Bam staring wide-eyed at her. “ Excuse me?” he yelled back. “ One of our own orphans admitted to daring her to leave!” the woman practically screamed. She grabbed Axel, who was now hiding behind Jess, and pulled the little girl over to her violently. “ Her description matches this little girl!” the woman then started to shake Axel by the shoulders. Bam gasped, and ran over to the woman. He pushed her away from his godchild, and pointed a threatening finger into the woman’s face. “ Don’t you dare touch her.” he growled. Axel was suddenly frightened, and tried getting Bam’s attention. “ Axel, go with Jess to the car.”
“ Come on sweetie, let’s go.” Jess said, as she scooped up the shaking girl. She carried her back to the truck. The woman watched them go with pure hatred in her eyes. Bam never took his eyes off the woman who was accusing them of stealing the child from an orphanage over one thousand miles away. “ So, what were you saying again?” Bam asked, his voice much calmer. Over one hundred people were watching the two, including Tony, Bucky, and Mike. “ That is not your friend’s daughter, Mr. Margera.” the woman said in a low, threatening tone. Bam paused for a few seconds, thinking. “ Okay then. Where did she come from?” The woman spoke louder this time. “ She came from the Kayak River Adoption Agency, Mr. Margera. She was put on a dare to leave the orphanage, and she did, with her beagle.”
Bam folded his arms, and replied, “ And what makes you so sure that Axel is actually an orphan?” Immediately, the woman replied, “ Her description matches every one of the features that our own orphan has given us. Mr. Margera, all I know is that your Axel is in fact, an orphan, and I am going to take her back to Pennsylvania with me.”
Bam sighed and said, “ Oh, fine.” Then, he turned away as if to go talk to Tony, Bucky, and Mike, but instead turned back around and threw a fist into the woman’s face. This started a whole fight, including the guards the woman came with, Bam, Bucky, and Mike. Tony had decided to stay out of it, and the woman had managed to back away. She and two other men that had stayed behind in the rush found a way to get directly to the car without Bam noticing. Unfortunately for the woman, when she opened the door, she found Nick sitting on one side, and Jenn on the other, with Axel in the middle. “ Goodbye!” Nick said and slammed the door shut in her face. Jess, who was sitting in the driver’s seat, locked the doors, and drove to the entrance of the demo. She rolled down the window just enough, and yelled, “ Bam!” he took this as his cue and scrambled away from the scene.
“ What the hell was that all about?” Jess scolded him. Bam sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “ I don’t know. That woman has a serious mental problem.” he turned around to face the back seat. “ You okay, Axel?” he asked, taking her hand. She fell silent, and did not answer him. She just looked at him with her big, worried, frightened eyes. “ I don’t want to go.” she whispered. Bam’s eyes glittered in the grayish light of the car, trying to tell her it would be alright. That he wouldn’t let anything happen to her. But her facial expressions didn’t budge an inch. He smiled slightly, as if that would reassure her, and then turned back around to sit in his seat.
He remained calm until Axel fell asleep. Then, he once again went into his depression. “ What am I gonna do?” he whispered to Jess, who was driving. “ Those damn government people are gonna believe that lady over me. They can’t take her.” Jess looked at her friend, who was holding his head in his hands. He looked back at the child who slept behind him, and smiled. It wasn’t her fault they beat the kids there. Suddenly, an idea formed in his head. “ Hey, wait...” he muttered. He lifted his head and looked over at Jess with that face that could only mean he had an idea. “ What if we catch them beating the kids?” he said. Jess looked over at him curiously. “ Bam, we don’t need to catch them.” she replied softly.
“ We’ve got plenty of witnesses from today.”
They arrived at Jess and Nick’s house at around 9 o’ clock. Bam took his godchild out of the car, and lay her down on the couch once they got inside. While everyone else was out of the room, Bam got to soothe his godchild, and talk to her without using some sort of code. “ I don’t want to go back there, Bam.” she whispered. She was laying down, with her head in his lap. “ I know you don’t. I promise, they won’t get you.” Her face showed she still wasn’t content. He looked down at her, and once Jenn came into the room, they stopped talking about it.
“ Hey, what was that all about?” she asked. “ What?” Bam replied. “ The demo?” Jenn nodded. “ Oh, uh, I have no friggin idea.” he said, while stroking Axel’s forehead. “ Are you sure?” she questioned, while moving to the couch to sit next to him. He sighed. “ Damn...” he muttered, “ Alright, as long as you promise not to tell anyone.” Jenn raised her right hand. “ Promise.” she said, and then moved closer so she could hear him.
“ Okay, well, on the 8th, we found her underneath a tree near the Castle. We don’t know where she came from, but we decided to stick to the dead dad story.” Jenn stared at him. “ Why didn’t you just tell the truth?” she whispered. “ I don’t want to lose her to those retarded orphan people who can’t take care of her.” he replied, his voice low. “ Well, Bam, it’s not like you know how to take care of a kid, either.” Jenn murmured, her head down.
“ I can take care of her better than them!” he shot back, voice still low. “ Well then, give her back, then adopt her.” she suggested. “ I can’t do that. I just promised her I wouldn’t let them have her.” Jenn paused after he said this. “ I think I have an idea.” she announced.
“ You have their number, right?” Bam thought for a moment. “ Ape does...” he said. Jenn jumped up. “ Call her!”
“ What is it? Is Axel still there?” April said into the phone. “ Yeah, Ape, uh, we had another run in with the orphanage.” Bam said. He and Jenn were in the bathroom, listening to April.
“ Yeah, I know. I heard. I watch Access Hollywood. Hey, how was your little brawl?” Bam shook his head. “ Shut up, Ape. We need the number the orphanage gave you.” Jenn looked at him, and hurried him up. “ Okay, the number is... 484-245-“ Bam interrupted her.
“ Hurry up, woman!” April paused for a second, then replied, “ Okay, chill out.” Bam sighed and rolled his eyes. “ Phone number! 484-245- what?” April paused, and then answered,
“ 6732.” Bam was rushing by this time. “ Okay! 484-245-6732! Goodbye!” Then he hung up.
“ Okay then! Dial away!” Jenn said before she repeated the number to him. “ Did it work?” she asked, but was interrupted by Bam. “ Shhh! It’s ringing.” he whispered. She waited impatiently, and when he suddenly perked up, she took the phone from him.
“ Kayak River Adoption Agency, how can I help you?” the man on the other line said. “ Yeah, hi, I’m calling about erm, Axel Margera?” she said. “ Oh, I’m so sorry, but she is still in the care of Mr. Margera. Once they arrive back in Pennsylvania, we’ll bring her back, but until then, there is a waiting list for the bidding. Would you like me to put you down on the list?” Jenn’s jaw dropped. “ Erm, no thanks. But, can you tell me how many people are on the list?” Bam looked at her suspiciously. He was about to say something, but she put her finger to her lips and he was silenced. “ Currently, there is a count of twenty four people.” the man on the other line announced. “ Oh, wow. Thank you. Bye.” Jenn said as she hung up.
Jenn stared at Bam in disbelief. “ WHAT?!?!” he yelled. “ Th- There’s a waiting list for her. Once you go back to West Chester, they’re gonna snag her. You can’t go back, Bam.” Bam looked at her wide-eyed. “ Have those people friggin lost their minds?” he shouted, and stormed out. “ BAM!” Jenn yelled down the hallway after him.
He marched into the kitchen and sat down. “ What’s the matter?” Jess asked, sitting down next to him. “ Those god damn adoption fags.” he muttered. “ What about them?” she replied. “ They’re gonna take Axel away as soon as we get into West Chester.” Jess gasped. “ Oh, my God, Bam! What’ll happen after they take her?” Bam held his head in his hands. “ There is a waiting list of twenty four fags who want to take her. I don’t know what to do.” Jess was mortified. “ She’s not an animal! They can’t just auction her off like that!” she protested. “ They can, and they will.” he argued, and put his head down on the table. “ Well, there’s got to be something we can do!” she urged. Bam’s head suddenly flew up. “ Yes! There is!” he cried, and whipped out his cell phone. After dialing the number, a man picked up. “ Kayak River Adoption Agency, how can I help you?”
The next day, Jess and Nick bade farewell to their guests. “ Bye sweetie,” Jess said to Axel as she pulled her into a hug. “ Be safe.” Axel nodded and took Bam’s hand. He looked down at her, then back at Jess. “ What if it doesn’t work?” Jess whispered. “ It will.” he muttered back. They boarded the plane, and took off for Philadelphia.
A few hours later, they arrived back in Pennsylvania. Once they got into the airport parking lot, two burly men stepped towards them. “ Are you Axel Margera?” they asked, looking down at the girl. She nodded her head, and hugged Bam’s pant leg. “ Sorry, miss, but you’ll have to come with us.” he jerked his head in the direction of the tan colored van that the men had arrived in. Axel gasped and looked up at Bam. He kneeled down, and whispered in her ear, “ Don’t worry. You’ll only be with them for three hours. Then, I’ll come back and get you.” She looked at him worriedly, and took the nearest man’s hand. Bam pulled her into a hug, and whispered, “ Don’t worry.”
He and Jenn watched the tan car roll away. Once the van was out of sight, Bam fell to his knees. “ The hardest fucking thing I ever have to do, and it ends up with a little kid.” he muttered. Jenn knelt down beside him. “ Come on. We have to get there on time.” she pulled him up by his shoulders, and took out his cell phone. Jenn flipped through the phone book for the Castle’s number, while Bam searched the surrounding area for anything tan.
“ What is it this time?” April said into the phone. “ Ape, Axel’s gone.” Jenn replied. April gasped. “ Oh, no, you guys lost her again?” Jenn dropped her shoulders and said, “ No, Ape! The orphanage took her.” April gasped louder and yelled, “ Oh my God!”
Two hours later, Bam was pacing the living room of the Castle, while the rest of the group was sitting down around him, on the couch, or in chairs. “ Bam, go do something. Take your mind off it for two minutes.” He whipped around, and glared at April, who mentioned it. “ Okay then.” she said, and went back to staring with the rest of them. Bam stopped, and then started pacing again. “ This can’t be healthy...” Jenn whispered to April, who nodded.
At the same time, Axel was surrounded by orphans. “ What was it like out there?” “ Is Bam really famous?” “ Did you really go to California?” “ What was it like there?” “ You really met Tony Hawk?” “ Wow, I wish I had left!” Tons of kids swarmed her with questions, and they expected her to answer. “ Leave her alone, guys, she hasn’t changed a bit. Except for those new clothes.” A voice called, sending all the orphans running.
Haden stood, tall and proud, in front of the quivering Axel. “ So, I guess you got a new name. Axel. Isn’t that a car part?” Haden sneered. Axel shrugged. “ I don’t know. And I don’t really care. It’s just a name.” The eight year old laughed. “ I guess you have changed. Ya know why I dared you to leave?” She stuck a finger into Axel’s face, making her dodge it. “ Because you were too quiet. And, now that I have heard what you sound like, maybe I’ll let you stay.” Anger grew in the six-year-old. “ Ya know why I left?” Axel asked, this time pointing a finger in Haden’s face. “ Because any house is a whole lot better than this dump. And any adult is nicer than Mrs. D. And it just so happens, that Bam is coming back, to get me. So shove it.” The crowd that formed around the two girls giggled, and made Haden glare at them. Her usual assertiveness wasn’t working, for the kids were still cracking up over Axel’s last two words. They did not fall silent as so many had under her rule. Once a rebel was declared, the kids embraced the rebel, and not the leader.
About a half hour later, Axel was sitting in a corner, thinking. “ Bam would be so proud of me for that.” she muttered, while everyone was moving away. A loud voice broke the silence that was forming around the small girl. “ Miss. Axel,” the woman in charge called, “ You will soon be needed downstairs. It is ‘Move Away Day’ you know.” Axel nodded her head and followed the large woman down a flight of stairs, through several pairs of double doors and a few hallways, and finally, they arrived at a room where a cluster of kids stood, excited, nervous, scared. Axel, however, was all of these emotions. She was excited because she would get to see Bam again, nervous because someone else might take her first, and scared because Bam might not come. But he had to come.
About fifteen minutes later, a swarm of people came in, and looked at all the kids. They stared at Axel for an especially long time. She just stood there and prayed that Bam would soon arrive.
Once all the kids were observed, the adults were seated to the right of the line of children. The woman in charge began speaking, and Axel began searching for Bam in the seats. She didn’t see any gray hat, or any brown hair. Or even Jenn’s blonde hair, for that matter. Axel couldn’t recognize anyone. She was all alone in the building.
“ So, who would like to adopt Ella?” One person raised their hand. The woman smiled.
“ And how much would you be willing to pay for this child? The minimum amount is fifty dollars.” The woman who raised her hand offered sixty, and the deal was set. It went this way up until Axel’s turn, whose minimum amount was raised to one hundred dollars. Almost everyone raised their hand for Axel. This made her quite uncomfortable, so she just kept her eyes shut and prayed that Bam would arrive. “ I’ll give you $350!” One man shouted.
“ $400!” another yelled. It continued this way until one person bet five hundred dollars.
“ Okay! Enough!” the woman shouted, which silenced everyone. “ The winner is Charlotte Ventura, with $500!” The woman cheered, while everyone else around her grumbled.
As the woman slowly made her way to the front of the room, Axel could have sworn she had seen a flash of grey and a dark yellow. A few seconds later, Bam and Jenn were in the doorway of the room. “ Sorry I’m late,” he announced. “ We got lost.” Axel brightened up, and was grinning. “ Nope! Too late! She’s mine!” Charlotte screeched. She grabbed Axel by the wrist as she tried to run for Bam. Frustrated, Bam called out, “ Hey, I’ll give you $1000 for her.” The woman was in complete shock. “ $1000! Here’s your Axel back! Gimme the money!” Charlotte stood there gaping like a fish. Axel smiled and stuck her tounge out at her would-be parent. Bam pulled out one thousand dollars, and handed it to the woman, who snatched it greedily. Once all the paper work was finished, Axel looked up at her new parent. “ Ya know, I still have that five bucks...”
* * *
A week later, Bam and the rest of his friends were sitting around the backyard porch, watching Axel freely play fetch with Blaze. April walked through the door, and sat down on a chair. “ What’re ya reading?” Bam asked, snatching the magazine from his mother’s hands. He looked at the cover, and threw it back to her, laughing. On the cover of the latest edition of Us magazine, read the words, “ We’re sorry, Bam. We lost ya.” In the background was a picture of Bam, Axel, the social worker, Jess, Nick, Jenn, Tony, Bucky, and Mike all at L.A. At the bottom of the page, it read, “ What’s really going on with Bam and Axel?” Bam had already read the article, several times in fact. He even read it to Axel. Twice.
Everyone knows by now that Bam has found his soul mate- 6-year-old Axel Margera. The girl goes everywhere with him. We’ve all seen pictures of them, or watched them on TV. But, what’s the real story with them? When they first appeared on August 8 at a skateboarding demo in Boston, Bam Margera, 25, claimed that his good friend had died and he was the rightful godfather. And to think we believed him. Once a Social Worker popped up at a demo in L.A., Bam changed his story around, claiming they found her, and didn’t know where she came from. Which was partly true. Bam and his team of misfits did find little Axel on Bam’s 14 acre land, but she had told them where she came from. She told them she came from an orphanage, but she didn’t know which one. Once the Social Worker from ‘Kayak River Adoption Agency’ appeared in L.A., they immediately knew where she was from. Try as he might, Bam could not keep his little girl away from the prowling claws of the orphanage. They snagged her at an airport in Philly, and she was taken back to be sent off to live with someone. Fortunately, that someone just happened to be Bam, who gave $1000 to the orphanage. Now, Axel is legally the child of Bam Margera. And just when we thought he’d never grow up. But, what happens now? Sources close to Bam say he is planning to go to Fiji and skate with Tony Hawk, while allowing himself some time away from the light his show, ‘Viva La Bam’, shines on him. “ The camera guys have been filming him getting up in the morning and falling asleep at night.” a source says. “ He needs some time off from the camera, and just do what he does best. But he can’t go without poor Axel, of course.” We’re sympathizing over here, Bam. So, even though all this stuff going on with Axel and Bam has been utterly confusing, we still love them. And to all you people who wish you had a reality show like ‘Viva La Bam’? Don’t ever, EVER get one. They show no mercy, those producers.
“ Wow. Fiji? You never told us that.” April said, looking up. “ I wasn’t planning on telling you, until somebody wailed.” He jabbed an elbow into Raab’s gut. “ Well, when are you going?” April asked. Bam paused to think. “ The end of August.” He announced. “ They didn’t mention I’d be taking these four with me.” Rake looked at him curiously. “ Where the hell’s Fiji?” he asked. “ Isn’t it near Japan, or something like that?” Bam stared at him. “ That’s Mount Fuji. And Fiji’s all isolated and shit near New Zealand. Good thing we’re leaving in what, six days?”
The rest of the week was spent packing. April did most of Axel’s packing, since she didn’t know exactly how to make clothes match yet. A day before they left, Jess and Nick called to say congratulations.
“ I heard a whole bunch of people were betting on her.” Jess said. “ Yep. There was twenty four people who first planned on betting on her, but a whole bunch more turned out. Look how popular I make people!” Bam replied. “ Is that Jess?” Axel asked. Bam nodded. “ Tell her I said hi!” she gasped. “ Uh, Axel says hi, Jess.” Bam said into the phone. He then held the phone out to his child. “ She wants to talk to you.” he said. “ Hi Jess!” Axel exclaimed.
“ Hi sweetie! I heard you were going somewhere! Where are you going? Bam won’t tell me.” Axel smiled up at Bam before replying, “ Fiji.” Bam’s eyes got incredibly wide, then slimmed down into little slits. Jess gasped. “ Fiji! Oh, I wish I could go. I’m so jealous.” Axel giggled. “ Alright, give the phone back to Bam now, I have to gloat.” Axel handed the phone to Bam, who took it and said into the phone, “ Oh, you little rat.”
The next day, Bam, Axel, Ryan, Raab, Brandon, Rake, and Blaze left the house with all their stuff. After arriving at the airport, they met Tony there, and after greeting all the people, the tall man knelt down and ruffled Axel’s hair. “ Hey! Did you get a new daddy?” Axel smiled, and looked up at Bam. He took her hand, and then they all went down to their plane, which would be leaving in five minutes.
They quickly boarded the plane, and set off for Fiji. Axel looked out the window and smiled. Bam’s twisted reality wasn’t so bad after all.